Love Writ Large

"People mistake confidence for courage. Being courageous, truly courageous, requires so much more than brazen cocky confidence. I'm not saying that all confidence comes from narcissism, that's not what I mean; but sometimes being brave, or selfless, and truly, profoundly courageous requires a selflessness, a risk, a sacrifice of ego and agenda that some people mistake for confidence when in fact it's so much more. Truly." Farley stops short. Maude has shifted her gaze over his shoulder and is fixated on the huge neon painted banner tacked up to the south side wall of the Agora. Her eyes slowly expand as the recognition factor sinks in. It's literally like watching pennies drop and tumblers fall into place, unlocking the final puzzle. Farley is sweating, he can feel his upper lip slick with moisture, his crotch moist in beige pants, visions of sweat stains in embarrassing places. "You see Maude, um, sometimes confidence blinds other people to the fact that underneath the bluster there really is no substance, nothing of any real merit or worth. Courage lays bare the heart and soul, the true essence of a person and that- that should be paramount in importance. Don't you agree? I mean maybe you don't, I don't know; I don't want to assume to know how you feel or what you think. I would NEVER make assumptions- I value your worth too much, but um, I think you're getting a sense of that right now..." Farley trails off, awkwardly swallowing his own breath. Maude is turning a fairly bright shade of red, a veritable cherry pink blooming up from her chest and spilling up into her cheeks, dark spots of maroon embers dead centre, circles of anger, steaming hot. He can see her start to shake, a slight tremor at first which grows into a full on palsy. Her lower lip drops open and words seem perched on the tip of her tongue. She stares at him, eye~locked. As if a sudden freeze envelops her, her skin fades back to normal, the trembling ceases and her lips close. Maude shuts her eyes, a slow, deliberate blink. "Say something, anything. I...I didn't mean to make you uncomfortable, I only wanted to tell you how incredible I..." Crack. A slingshot. Her hand flies up and out from the side of her hip and sweeps cross his cheek making a sound like crackling tin. Sharp, shocking. Farley's eyes water, his cheek burns. Speechless. Maude strides past him, rips the banner down, tumbling it in on itself, wadding it up like used toilet paper and drops it at his feet. "I'm so-"  He can't breathe. "Don't." she says. "Just don't." He has no words so he hangs his head down and cries.

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Moving in Stasis

Kindness Is A Boomerang

Good, Not Great